Now thats why ya gotta carry a big ol purse, Touch my kid and I'll handbag your head a few hundred times.
Now thats why ya gotta carry a big ol purse, Touch my kid and I'll handbag your head a few hundred times.
Why do people assume a crying child needs smacked? Ever consider the fact that the child is already crying, maybe something is wrong? Parent could be an asshat, teething and other growing pains. It's not always a tantrum. People who fall back on the old "They just need a whupping" thing either never had kids, or sucked as a parent.
Senior Death Hag
I can not believe the nerve of this man. I would have a VERY hard time restraining myself if anyone did that to one of my children. The possibility of getting arrested myself in front of my kids would be the only thing that would stop me from it. Fucking cranky ass old man. Probably waves a shotgun at kids who accidentally kick a ball into his yard, too.
Renowned Death Hag
Originally Posted by rickenbacker
My roommate has a 2 year old boy. Trust me, 99% of the time when he's crying, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. Most of the time it IS just a tantrum. It's so f***ing annoying
Stop that crying or I'll give ya something to cry about, That was my mom's faverate. And She had a way it sure worked, at least it would stop me from howling, I'd just do the heap, heap thing, after she said that
I hope he gets it but good in court. I try to be nice, and kind, but if this had happened to my son, well, I go a little crazy on defense. As was stated above, you do not mess with mamma bear.
I've seen people that just let their children cry and cry, and do not pay attention to them. I sometimes go up and see if they need help in some way, or talk to the child. I did this just yesterday in CVS with a woman who's adorable little boy was crying. Sometimes, just a stranger coming over and talking nicely to the child will help, and if it's a mom on her own, I try to give her some kindness, too.
I agree, Inked. Slapping and hitting a child is the lazy way. I do get angry when I see parents hitting their own children in public, especially if it's severe. I have said things to the parents when I've seen that. I figure at least the kids will know someone else knows what the parent is doing is wrong and will grow up remembering that. I guess I am wrong for doing that but I just can't stand to see it. Because if they are angry, an angry retort just might exacerbate the problem for the child so I try to be more careful.
He's TWO!! Guess what? Two-year-olds cry!! It's part of the process. I think it's time I leave this thread. I have no fucking patience with this "kids crying are soooo annoying".My roommate has a 2 year old boy. Trust me, 99% of the time when he's crying, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. Most of the time it IS just a tantrum. It's so f***ing annoying
wow chill out. I'm well aware that 2 years old will cry and whine a lot, never said they weren't supposed to, BUT, that doesn't mean I have to pretend it's like sweet music to my ears when he does it. I admit YEA it is damn annoying but that doesn't mean I love the kid any less for it.
i agree... i am mom, i know how it goes. i know how it is when your child wants to act a DAMN FOOL in the store, writhing on the ground like it is the friggen end of the world. until its your own child, some one needs to let the parents handle it. if the parents DON'T, then that is on them.
people just need to be a grown ups and ignore it. seriously.
Renowned Death Hag
Kids don't have to cry all the time. They do because they are tired, hungry, or just plain spoiled. The latter is when they need a slap to the dome. I understand that kids are kids and they do cry, but you know what? Why do I have to listen to it? Why don't you just not bring your kid out in public if you know they are in a bad mood or cranky. Just playing devil's advocate here.
Last edited by Miho; 09-02-2009 at 10:56 AM.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"I will be buried in a spring loaded casket filled with confetti, and a future archaeologist will have one awesome day at work."
Renowned Death Hag
I never understood smacking a child who is already crying and throwing a tantrum, all that is showing them is that it is okay to hit, wrong lesson to teach your child IMHO.
I am a mom and yes two yr olds cry, you are so right they could be teething, stomach ache etc.. There are so many wonderful people out there who can't have childrend and would love to hear the cry of a child in their lives.
Some people need to take a step back and look at what smacking their child can do, this child could grow up to be an abuser, yeah we don't need anymore of them around let me tell ya. There are so many negatives in hitting a child than you can even imagine.
I'm certainly not going to tell you that being a parent is easy it isn't, just two yr olds need timeouts not smacks.
Okay rant over I'm done.
Renowned Death Hag
Ok so I read that really fast and thought you said child could grow up to be an asshat. *LOL*
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"I will be buried in a spring loaded casket filled with confetti, and a future archaeologist will have one awesome day at work."
lmao.
I love Supernanny!"Time Outs" were what I used, too.
Renowned Death Hag
Renowned Death Hag
I was the opposite. I got smacked around as a kid and I learned damn fast to behave myself (Or at least hide the bad stuff I did). I used to be strongly against spanking, then I saw what little darlings some children are turning out to be because of spanking becoming the new taboo. Maybe we wouldn't be reading about 10 year old raping and killing each other if their parents gave them a swift kick in the butt when they misbehaved instead of "respecting their child's independence." Or perhaps they'd be more.. *shrug* what the hell do I know
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"I will be buried in a spring loaded casket filled with confetti, and a future archaeologist will have one awesome day at work."
Renowned Death Hag
That is true also in many cases. I think if you go the non spanking route you have to put the work in to dicipline your child in other ways....many people miss the boat when they let the kids just run wild.I was the opposite. I got smacked around as a kid and I learned damn fast to behave myself (Or at least hide the bad stuff I did
I got smacked on the butt when I was bad and you bet your ass I learned my lesson and never did what I was smacked for again. Of course, children probably deal with discipline different ways. Giving them a whoopin' could make them better like it did for me, or make it worse. Then maybe a Time Out is in order.
a lot of the kids that DON'T get smacked are the ones that do grow up to be total asshats, imho. when did parents become so afraid of their children?
and i'm not saying parents should be beating up their kids or anything but jeebus!, some parents act like they're here to do their kids bidding and if they don't THEY will be punished
back on topic though: i do think that p.o.s. old guy in walmart is a total bitch
Last edited by Tripfaceape; 09-02-2009 at 11:25 AM.
You got kids, Trip?
No Hon not me. lol
I'm baking one right now
and I wasn't trying to say all kids need to be smacked or anything, I realize it kinda comes across that way. the kids that don't get disciplined at all is more what I was thinking
Two year olds do not have the verbal capacity to express what is wrong with them, therefore they cry. Hell, walmart makes ME want to cry when I go in there. Two year olds are easily overstimulated. (I have more of a problem with the teenagers screaming at their parents and seven year olds ramming my cart as hard as they can with their own cart that they are tearing around the place with...) Some children do, indeed, need to be spanked but it does not need to be done out of anger. And certainly not by some sicko stranger in a walmart!
and for the record, I'm not surprised, but this took place about 10 miles from my house.
Administrator
My daddy used to say "Stop that crying or I'll put you somewhere where you'll have something to cry about."
If that little button had been mine I would have tore that Georgia Cracker fucktard a new asshole where his nose is.
As Finn says, children cry. Sometimes they are in a snit about something or nothing at all. There is absolutely no reason to slap a child in the face. I don't care if it's mama, popa, or a stranger.
One of my sisters and her son were living with me once and she slapped him a good one across the face and I lit into her like a duck on a Junebug.
She goes "He's my kid!" I go "It's my house! And I will be damned if you mistreat him here!"
Cindy, I love the way you talk.
I beg to differ Hon, kids do need guidelines/barriers they want them and I think punishing them whether it is timeout or taking away their privledges is a great way to show them, now when a parent punishes their child, you have to follow through you can't go soft on them or they will walk all over you. I will agree that some parents are afraid of their kids, but smacking them, I just don't see what that solves. I am a teacher and deal with children that have emotional problems some were abused as kids etc... They want to be loved and shown the right way, they don't set out to be bad children. Like I said before smacking/hitting only encourages more hitting and shows that it is okay for mom or dad to hit me then it is okay for me to hit others.
I never smacked/spanked my kids, I am not a perfect mother I'll be the first to admit it.
Understood.I'm baking one right now
and I wasn't trying to say all kids need to be smacked or anything, I realize it kinda comes across that way. the kids that don't get disciplined at all is more what I was thinking
However, I must say people (in general) should talk less and listen more before they speak about something they know nothing about.
So when your baby is done cooking and you are about half-way through those terrible twos, we can have a little chat.
♥
ROFL
You don't have kids. Most of the time there is not an option of leaving the kids at home just so you can go do the shopping. I have two jobs & for five years my child went everywhere I did when I wasn't at work. I had to run errands when my husband was working. So that meant cranky or not, tired or not, tantrum or no tantrum I had to get things done.
This is not directed at you Miho, but I absolutely love it when people suggest just leaving when kids start misbehaving.All that does is teach them that if they scream & yell you'll give up & go home.
Some people don't know what spanking is. They call it "hitting" & "abusing." If you spank when you're angry at them that's bad. That's not spanking. My son gets pops & I am mad at him & make him sit in time out so we can both cool down. Then he gets a spank & we talk about why & I always hug him & tell him I love him. My son does not benefit from time outs. He doesn't care. He gets them from time to time, but a good swift swat usually does the trick. Now that he's older he gets grounded.
Oh yeah - about this case...
That guys is the spitting image of what I imagined he'd look like when I read the topic. That's too funny. What an idiot. I would have jumped him. I would have pepper sprayed him then jumped him.
I got a grand total of three spankings in my lifetime. I was always sent to my room first so that whichever parent could calm down. I deserved every single one of them. Mainly I was restricted from tv or the phone as I got older. It is NEVER okay to hit your child out of anger. Children at that age don't understand that hitting is a "discipline technique" and just know that they are being hit by their parent. Discipline should be a logical consequence and if it is not, it is a disconnect and your child will likely reoffend whatever rule was broken.
oh, and I was just informed that this is the walmart that is beside the hobby lobby I go to. well, that particular walmart is under renovations and it's a madhouse in there. No wonder the kid was crying.
Ruby,
I don't have kids. I don't mind hearing kids fussing. I use that term vs heart rending sobs which just tear my heart up when I hear them.
Kids fuss and pout and cry from any number of reasons. I fly alot and the change in pressure on little ears and the new sensations can terrify some kids. That doesn't bother me. Also the concept of sit still and be quiet for 2 or more hours wears thin for little guys on a plane. That doesn't bother me. What does bother me is when they are sitting behind me and they begin to kick the back of my seat. The parents know it because they are asking the little one to stop. Then the tempo and strength of the kicks increase and the parent just keeps negotiating and actually pleading with them to stop. At some point the parent has to become the adult and end the behavior. Walk them down the aisle, take them to the galley, stand them up look out the window but stop them from kicking the seat.
I do think that some parents are so focused and being their kid's playmates and buddies they forget to be adult parents.
I watch my cousin with her 2 year old Zach and she enjoys him so much and he just glows when they are spending time together. I don't know how she does it but when he begins to really act out (which is pretty seldom) she gets a slight change to her voice and posture and he knows she means business. I would bet every penny I have she has never hit him but he knows the rules will be enforced and funtime will be over.
That is parenting. We went out to dinner with Zach and his Mom and Dad and half way through the meal something was clearly wrong. He was fussy and not eating and flushed. They conferenced and then had their meals packed up to go and called later that he had an ear infection. That is parenting.
People in adult settings should expect reasonable control from parents, people going to bounce U or Chuckies just needs to get in the groove and cover their ears if they don't like it.
Regards,
Mary
Last edited by STsFirstmate; 09-02-2009 at 11:54 AM.
That's so sweet. It's what I think every parent should do after disciplining their child. Make sure they know what they did was bad, but after the fact let them know that you love 'em.
Senior Death Hag
Good for you, Cindy! I've got 4 kids and I have NEVER slapped them across the face....the butt yes, face no.
When I first saw this thread, I thought maybe it was about our local Wal-Mart. I was shopping there last evening and there was a 2 year old just crying and crying while sitting in the cart. Yes, it can be annoying, but it looked like her mom was doing everything in her power to calm the little one down. This kid was LOUD. I made eye contact with her a few times and smiled and waved..it helped for a second or two.
I think this guy should be tied up in a room full of moms and they could slap him around for awhile. I guarantee you, he'll have more than a red mark on his face.
I just hope this guy never fathered any children. If he did this to a little girl who he didn't know and while out in public, Lord knows what he would do to kids of his own.
"Dying is just nature's way of saying, hey, you're not alive anymore!"
Wow, I can't believe I just NOW looked at that dude's picture. He's the epitome of the crotchety old man.
Me, too.
Last edited by Long Gone Day; 09-02-2009 at 11:59 AM.
imo, no child should ever ever ever be hit across the face. i don't think I would have ever gotten over it if i had been hit in the face as a child. I'd still be pissed off at whoever did it. I hold lifelong grudges.
Bravo, Mary. Obviously, you have some experience with children in your profession and life and that is fantastic. I don't think you have to be a parent to understand, but to have people judge others based on the behavior of their children is unfair and it really bothers me. A LOT. Parenthood does not come with a manual - it is trial by error. Unfortunately there can be extreme cases, but for the most part i think parents do the best they can with what they have.
Also, not all children are the same. Some are quiet & compliant & well behaved. Some are like mine, strong willed.
I have thought he was possessed at times. I was the same way though & I turned out semi okay. lol
Administrator
My mother beat me with a leather belt. She never slapped my face until I was an adult and I slapped her back. I still feel some guilt for that because she was my mother, but she deserved it. I was protecting my 13 year old sister. Sister loved plants and had several potted in her bedroom. For some reason, mostly because she was just a kid, she laid a bath towel down somewhere in her bedroom and repotted a plant on it. Instead of bundling the towel up and shaking the soil free outside, she just stuck the dirt filled towel in the laundry hamper. Mama found it and Oh. My. God. Did she freak out. Sister went flying down the hall, mama on her ass, and I was right behind them. Sister ran into her bedroom, slammed and locked the door, and I thought mama was going to break the door down. So I started tossing words at mama that I didn't mean but I aimed to do whatever it took to turn her anger on me instead of my little sister. Mama whirled and popped me a good one across the face, and I slapped her back. We looked at each other, and she was the first to look away, went back into the kitchen to continue cooking and drinking and acting as if nothing had happened.
Amen Ruby! no manual for sure. I can't imagine it! I am 57 and my wife is 50. We have been together ofr 13 years and several times we have discussed having kids. We were revisiting the idea a couple of years ago when our two cousins (brother and sister) who married their respective spouses witnin a month of each other and then a year later announced both families were expecting and their kids were born 6 weeks apart, Alana and Zach. Two different little people with very different sets of parents. We are frequent sitters for one or both. This has killed any delusions we had that we could be adequate parents to a little one in our 50s. They have us clearly out gunned and they are really good kids. We are now discussing fostering older 12 to 16 year old kids. I have a friend in Cincinnati that does this now and she has been a good and honest resource for discussing it.
There is no reason to ever slap a child in the head or face in my opinion. My Dad never laid a hand on me and my Mother only slapped me in the face once and I was 17 and trust me I earned it.
Authority from physical violence is always a cheat and the lazy way out.
Regards,
Mary
Senior Death Hag
He should not have slapped someone else's child and if it had been my kid he'd have my foot up his ass.
On the other hand, what is wrong with people that they don't mind inflicting their crying, screaming children on others? When mine were little if they cried non-stop we gathered our shit up and went home. I've left more than one full buggy in a store just to get my kids out of there.
you were a great big sister.
Me, too.
Of course! I never grew up with a Dad, so it was all my mom raising me. She's one of my best friends
I so don't get this. Spanky a kid is one thing but slappintg their face is insane.
Administrator
RaRa is right, never punish a child when you're angry. That very thing was brought home to me one day when I was babysitting my then three y/o niece and two y/o nephew. She could fly into a snit with the best of them but was generally a sweet little girl. He was a bugger from the get go. He loved my mother like nobody's business.
His daddy's mother had died and I was keeping him and his cousin while her mom took my mother to the funeral home. Was he mad because my mother had left him there with me instead of letting go along? Noooooooooo. He was enraged. He picked one of those big spin tops and threw it against the wall. He picked up his little big wheel and threw it against the plateglass window in the front door. I tried to talk to him but he would not listen.
I was angry, which was natural, so I decided to give him a time out. I picked him up and laid him down on my mama's bed. But. In laying him down I accidentally slammed the back of his little head against the wooden head board. I could have died right there. I sat him up, threw my arms around him and told him how much I loved him and that I hadn't meant to hurt him. He forgave me. And I said "You know what? Let's the three of us go down to Kroger and buy the makings for a cake. How about that? And you guys can help me bake it." And off we went.
I could have really hurt him. That was like 22 years ago and it still haunts me.
P.S. I'm glad yall like my stories, but I wouldn't call them Walton; more like Soap meets All My Children. Ha!
Smacking the kid is not the way to end a tantrum. Trust me. Ignoring the tantrum makes it end quicker, because they're not getting a reaction. Or at least not getting the reaction they want.My roommate has a 2 year old boy. Trust me, 99% of the time when he's crying, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. Most of the time it IS just a tantrum. It's so f***ing annoying
I actually misread it at first..then I realised it WASN'T EVEN HIS CHILD!!!!!!...WTF.....if someone slapped Scarlett...and (Smug mode)...she is always well behaved when we are out as I've brought her up to be like that...and to say please and thank you(smug mode off)....he'd be in a crying heap on the floor and I'd have a lovely new pair of testicle earrings....which I'd rip off....then throw some vinegar on the gaping wound...just so he got the message.
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